


if it means a lot to you

by withretinadisplay



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-28 23:55:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8467891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withretinadisplay/pseuds/withretinadisplay
Summary: Kelley goes to France.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this a while ago. a long while ago. i finally decided to post it so enjoy!

"La, la la la, la la la," Alex quietly sang as she mindlessly flipped through a magazine in their hotel room. Kelley was sitting in a chair flipping through the dull TV channels hoping something would catch her attention. Putting the magazine down, Alex shifted on the bed to get a better look at Kelley. It was rare to see the defender so calm; her face and shoulders completely relaxed, breaths even. Alex liked her best this way.

 

"Why are you smiling at me like that, you creep?" Kelley laughed and threw the nearest pillow in Alex's direction, it hit the wall.

 

"I'm not a creep," Alex retaliated, the smile still in her eyes. 

 

"Answer the question, Al."

 

"I don't know," Alex shrugged, lying. She grabbed the pillow from its position between the bed and wall and tucked it under her chin.

 

"Alexandra." Kelley's voice a bit more serious this time. Alex never doesn't know why she's doing something. Everything Alex does has a reason, and both of them knew that. All of her movements were calculated, even the smallest ones.

 

Alex sighed. "We haven't spent that much time together, y'know we've been so busy. We're about to get even busier. It's nice to see you calm for once. Not while being asleep at least," she rambled slightly. Kelley didn't mind it at all. It wasn't often Alex got to be so candid. Kelley liked her best this way.

 

Alex had a point: they were only going to get busier. They were in the calm between storms. Kelley had some news to share only her family and coaches knew about. Alex deserved to know, but she could never figure out the right time to tell her. In that moment, Kelley decided to share anyway.

 

"Hey, can you come over here?" Kelley turned the TV off, not moving from the chair. Alex climbed onto Kelley's bed with a curious expression that Kelley quickly picked up on; it made her nervous. "I don't know how to tell you this. I should've told you before all this," she said waving her hands around the room.

 

"Kel, just tell me."

 

"I'm going to France," Kelley whispered. Alex almost missed it. Kelley wouldn't make eye contact with the girl in front of her. Alex grabbed one of Kelley's shaking hands to show everything was fine.

 

"When?"

 

"After next season."

 

"What team?"

 

"Lyon."

 

"Hm. Solid choice," Alex said with a grin.

 

Kelley was slightly taken aback by Alex's reaction. "You took this really well."

 

"I'm happy for you, Kel. Playing in Europe was something you've always wanted," she reassured. Alex was genuinely glad for her best friend, but a large selfish part of her wasn't. She wanted Kelley close to her as possible all the time. She reminded herself this wasn't about what she wanted, but what her best friend needed. "Who have you told?"

 

"My family, Jill, Sky Blue, and...you," her voice had a slight tremble. She was well aware that Alex didn't want her to leave; it was written all over her face. Alex was smiling, but it was a sad smile that didn't reach her eyes. That look alone her made her think about staying, but the girl was right, this was something she'd always wanted.

 

"Well, I'm happy you told me and I'm honored to be one of the first to know. I just have one request?”

 

“Shoot it.”

 

“Wear thirteen for me."

~~~

"Kel."

 

"Al."

 

"Look at me, Kelley," Alex insisted. They were sitting on the grass behind their hotel watching the Brazilian sunset. Kelley had been acting weird the past few days. Alex already knew the problem, but she wanted to hear Kelley say it.

 

"This tournament doesn’t feel right," Kelley mumbles before Alex could ask what's wrong, still avoiding eye contact. She was almost defeated at this point. The Olympics were supposed to be a fun time, but it's felt like the team was shifting in a bad direction. It would be the last time she played with the national team before heading to France.

 

"What are you thinking?" she asks, turning away from the dim Manaus sunset to give Kelley her undivided attention. "Was it the game today?"

 

"It feels like I’m not doing enough." Her laugh was forced. She knew she was giving this tournament her all, but the team was somehow still dragging, not finding their rhythm. Kelley knew her worth, she always has. From not making the U-20 roster because she spoke out against the coach to accepting a role as a defender when Alex out ran her as a forward to becoming the starting right back for the Olympics. "It feels like everyone isn’t doing enough."

 

"You leave soon." Alex was trying to convincing herself more than reassuring Kelley. She tried to not think about it, but the days were closing in faster than either of them would've liked. The beach house in LA they have during off season would just be her and Tobin, and even Tobin would be with Christen most of the time. "You'll play with the best in the world." The sun was gone now.

 

"I'm not ready."

 

"To play at that level?"

 

"To leave." That's what Alex wanted to hear. What Kelley didn't say was that she wasn't ready to leave Alex. They'd nearly built their lives around each other: spending breaks together, being roommates during national team camps, confiding in each other when no one else would understand. Kelley wasn't ready for new teammates, a strange place with an unknown language, months away from home, and the 6 hour time difference from Alex.

 

"What if I took you to the airport?"

 

"I might make you come with me."

Their trip to Rio wasn’t the one they expected, but Kelley and Alex made sure to spend every sunrise and sunset on Copacabana Beach.

~~~

"La, la la la, la la la," Kelley sang from her small apartment in Lyon as she waited for Alex to answer her FaceTime call. The sun was going down, but it was still warm enough for Kelley to hang out on the balcony.

 

"Good evening!"

 

"Good afternoon!"

 

They laugh softly at their greeting's unusual cheeriness.

 

"How've you been?" They hadn't talked much since Kelley left. It was NWSL offseason, but Kelley had no time to relax before jumping right into her time with Lyon. The European game was different: slower, more technical, obsessed with one-touch passing. It was a lot to take in.

 

"Tired," Kelley said, taking her bun down and letting her hair fall however it wanted. "And slightly stressed. My first game was a mess."

 

"It wasn't."

 

"It was."

 

"I watched it." Alex had stayed up well into the night to watch Kelley start against Juvsiy. It was a home game, so they had a special announcement for their new player: Olympic gold medalist, World Champion, number thirteen Kelley O'Hara. Alex was too distracted by the roaring crowd to catch that Kelley kept the promise to wear her number. "You looked good as left wing."

 

"It's not my natural position."

 

"Is defender your natural position?" Alex was right. It was weird playing solely in the midfield, but then again she wasn't comfortable being in the backline at one point. This time was different than the last. She was surrounded by people she'd know for years, not weeks. She had Hope guiding and helping with mistakes. Kelley didn't have that this time around. It was all guess and hope, and it seemed like Alex wasn't really thinking about that part of it.

 

"Your legs stole my natural position," Kelley said with a slight laugh turning the conversation into something less serious. She wasn't in the mood.

 

Alex knew she had to pull Kelley out of her head. "Kel, show me your apartment." So that's what Kelley did. She walked around awkwardly holding her laptop so Alex could see around. Her roommates were gone for the night, so she was able to be as silly as she wanted without judgement. She showed Alex the kitchen with the squeaky stove they were all afraid to use. Kelley let her see the weird paintings they bought from some kids at a market. Alex thought Kelley's room was the most interesting. It was surprisingly clean, lacked color, and had no pictures plastered everywhere. It was cold.

 

"Did you love that wonderful apartment tour?" Kelley asked as she moved back to the balcony, but this time with a blanket.

 

"Why isn't there stuff in your room?" Alex asked as she resituated herself on the bed.

 

"I don't know. I guess because it's temporary."

 

"Make it feel like home, Kelley. You'll be there for months."

 

"This is not home, Alex." Kelley didn't want to make it her home. Home is where the heart is, and her heart wasn't there. It was on another continent, in another house. It was directly across the screen. Alex was her home, she always had been. Forget learning a new team, a new style of play, a new position, and a new country; the hardest part of it all was leaving Alex. 

 

"Do it for me." It came off as more of a demand than a suggestion. Alex just wanted Kelley to be happy.

 

"I'll see," she answered half asleep. It was way late, but staying up for her best friend was worth it.

 

"Kel, I really miss you," Alex practically whispered. She wanted to say something else but instead just looked at her favorite green eyes through the screen.

 

"Come visit."

 

"You couldn’t make me leave."

~~~

"I'm getting my bag now," Kelley told Ashlyn over the phone. She was in Orlando for their home opener against WNY in the new stadium. She wanted to surprise Alex, so she was staying with Ash for the time being. It was a risky move, but she asked Lyon if it was okay if she could miss a game. The coaches all agreed she'd earned it, her stats were some of the highest, so they let her off. Alex came to visit her in France so it was only right to make this trip.

 

"Your girl got a puppy," Ashlyn beamed after Kelley finally made it in the car.

 

"A Frenchie?"

 

"You know it!" Kelley was happy to hear this. Ashlyn had been sending her pictures of dogs nonstop since the beginning of time. 

 

"Does Ali know?"

 

"Did Alex tell you before she got a puppy?"

 

"Alex and I aren't dating." It was weird to say that out loud. Kelley thought about it many times for sure. The things they did for each other, like flying halfway across the world, were things best friends should do for each other. But there are things you only do for people you really love like wearing their number just because they asked.

 

"She loves you," Ashlyn said after several minutes of driving in silence, the radio barely audible. "And before you give me that 'best friend' bullshit, she never stop talking about how proud she is of you. She talked about how she witnessed that god awful goal you scored in person for at least three days."

 

"That goal was nice, asshole!"

 

"It was bad goalkeeping."

 

"It was a beautiful back heel."

 

"Anyway, back to what I was saying. You two need to make out or something. Y'all love each other too much." Ashlyn gave Kelley a nudge as she pulled into her driveway. Kelley was too busy trying to figure out an response to react. She knew Ashlyn was right. That goal was bad goalkeeping, but Alex was in the stands to see it, so she loved it. They did love each other too much. Kelley valued Alex's opinion over anyone else's, her mom and sister included.

 

"I never said I loved her."

 

"You did when you agreed to wear her number."

 

Kelley and Ashlyn spent the rest of the evening catching up on all the gossip and playing with the new puppy, Brownie. She was the same color as Alex's dog, Blue, hence the name. Ash did it to mess with Alex, but it was all fun. Kelley hadn't seen Blue in nearly 8 months, but Alex would always show him on facetime. She'd say "Look, Blue! Look so you don't forget her." Kelley thought it was lame every time, but now it had her wondering if it actually worked. It was the last thing on her mind before she fell asleep that night.

 

The next morning arrived faster than she'd planned; Brownie had managed to sneak herself in and pull the covers off the bed. All before Ash got up, Kelley had taken Brownie for a walk and made breakfast.

 

"You make a good housewife, O'Hara," Ash mumbled with a mouthful of eggs.

 

"Fuck off."

 

The drive to the stadium was shorter than Kelley remembered, or she was too deep in her head to have paid the drive any attention. She explored the new stadium she'd only been in once before; it was way nicer than the Citrus Bowl. She stood in the tunnel looking out onto the grass pitch when she heard a familiar voice from behind.

 

"Kelley?"

 

"Hey!" It was Aubrey Bledsoe, her old Sky Blue teammate. They hadn't seen each other in so long.

 

"What are you doing here? Your season isn't over is it?"

 

"No, no. I'm just here to surprise Alex."

 

"It'll definitely make her feel better! See you around," she chimed while walking away, waving. Kelley was slightly confused by what she meant by her making Alex feel better. Alex nor Ash mentioned her not feeling good. She was once again too deep in thought to feel someone grab her hand, pulling her to the side. It was Ashlyn.

 

"Go to the locker room. She's the last one in there." That's what Kelley did. She greeted the rest of the team as they walked out for warmups. The locker room was quiet, but she could hear Alex's soft movements from around the bend.

 

"Al?"

 

"Kel?"

 

"Hey, you," Kelley whispered as she turned the corner.

 

"Kelley!" Alex pulled her into the tightest possible hug. She tried putting four months of missing Kelley into a single gesture. Kelley held on, taking in the scent of the clean jersey and the coconut shampoo Alex saves specifically for game days. "What are you doing here?"

 

"To surprise you, obviously," Kelley said, reluctantly pulling away. "What's this I hear about you being in a bad mood?"

 

"I had a bad preseason."

 

"You had a ton of assists."

 

"I wanted goals, Kel."

 

"Don't let a shitty preseason ruin your regular season before it even starts." Kelley lead them out to the tunnel. "All those people out there? The fans? That team? They love you and you're their captain. You're my captain. Don't let us down." Kelley's words came out firm and sturdy. It's the motivation Alex needed from the only person that could give it to her. 

 

"I won't let you down."

 

"Appreciate that. Get a hatty for me." Kelley was making her way to the sidelines to get ready for the game before Alex yelled her name, stopping her dead in her tracks. "Yeah, Al?"

 

"I love you, too."

**Author's Note:**

> i'd like to dedicate this to o_morgan because she told me to put this up literal months ago.
> 
> i have more stuff lingering in my google drive so maybe more short things to come!
> 
> questions and/or concerns? come yell at themorgans on tumblr dot com.
> 
> p.s. there could be another part to this if it's Wanted


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